The Fifty Minute Hour

Thoughts on therapy and life

New Year, Old Me.

3 Comments


Midnight on New Years Eve

Midnight on New Years Eve

New Years Eve is absolutely my least favourite day of the year and I’ve been trying to figure out exactly why that is.

I gave up on the enforced jollity of the NYE party years ago, and am most likely to be found asleep when the year passes from old to new, but I don’t think my antipathy is entirely based on an aversion to desperate fun and socialising. It’s more to do with the general Zeitgeist at this time of year which urges us to make resolutions, set goals, change our lives and generally “live better” in the forthcoming year.

My problem with this is mainly that just because the date changes, doesn’t mean I have to.  If I wanted to run a marathon (and I quite fancy it, because you must feel great when it’s over) I could have done it this year, last year or any other year. I am not more likely to do it in 2013 just because I write it on a list and call it a resolution. And honestly? I’m pretty sure I won’t ever run a marathon because I just don’t want to  – enough.

This is my point, the whole new year resolution thing ignores the fact that whether it’s a new year, a new job, a new relationship, it’s still YOU.  Which is why real change, comes from the inside. Change is hard, really hard, be it giving up something, or altering unhelpful habits or patterns of behaviour, it takes commitment, effort and often help, but you can start the change any time, because if you’re ready to make it, nothing else will get in the way.

And by real change I mean changes that help you live a better life, changes that are good for you, not changes you think you should be making for others.  New year diets, de-toxes, exercise regimes, blah blah blah, are designed to ensure that we start the new year with the notion that we are not ok as we are. This should last until the spring when we will be told we are not acceptable for the beach and urged to get ourselves fit for summer, after which it is only a few short months until we will be urged to shed a few pounds in order to fit into Christmas party dresses. It’s relentless, here’s an idea though, why not the start (and live) the new year liking yourself as you are? Just an thought.

A  wise friend of mine said recently after a very arduous year, that her plan for the future was just to live and love, and really, I literally can’t think of a better idea, so  that’s what I want for 2013, to live and love.

 

Happy New Year x

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Author: Johanna Sartori BA MBACP Accred.

I'm just working at finding my way through life, and travelling with those on the same journey

3 thoughts on “New Year, Old Me.

  1. Glad I’m not alone in feeling like this about New Year! I’ve always hated it too and seen it as a bit of a pointless forced fun non-event with. One of the brilliant things I have noticed about growing a bit older is not giving two hoots what other people think. So I do stay in and be “boring” at New Year and I don’t make resolutions. Small changes are better and throughout the year, when the time feels right…and the middle of winter certainly doesn’t! Previous goals are no longer achievable because of physical health, so if anything my resolution is to make new achievable goals and to be easier on myself! So perhaps New Year can be useful after all, for acceptance?

  2. I think that redefining goals in the light of changed circumstances is a scary and brave thing to do, but also really life positive, I wish you luck with the year ahead!

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